Because as time moves on, friendships can change or die
Intimacy Dilemma
My problems with intimacy
Are not so much a dilemma
As a superpower.
Like every superpower, mine
Has a built-in destruction code
Guaranteeing, or at least hinting
At the likelihood
That it will lead to problems.
So far, I’ve only had
A few nicks and cuts and minor flesh wounds
In reaction to my intimacy superpower
But even these take a cumulative
Form and effect
And a little piece of me
Over and over.
Here’s the deal:
I make everyone
With whom I come in contact
Feel that they are my
Best friend forever
And when they find out that they aren’t
They leave remembering me,
if at all, as simply that
fake friend,
that guy who acted like he liked them
but who liked everybody else just as much
so his love and friendship
was useless.
I’m not sure of a better way
To describe this.
I apologize to all of you
Who I led to expect much more from me
Than I was/am willing or able to give.
Next time, I’d suggest that you
Don’t tell someone all that shit about yourself
Just because they tell you shit about themselves.
The Golden Rule doesn’t always work.
In truth, no rule always works.
So once again,
Sorry.
But if I’m being honest with you
I don’t miss you,
all that much
I have too many others
More than willing to give me their time
In return for some of mine.
Ego Integrity
There are some wholesale
Bad things about me
That if you know me well,
Or are especially good
at intuitive understandings,
you would quickly or eventually grasp.
Also some lovely things
That might make you feel known and loved in return.
Bad things (even evil)
Good things (even heavenly)
You’ve been warned
And
You’ve been invited.
The rest of this is, now,
In your hands and hearts.
As we grow older
and if we’re lucky,
eventually
old.
We better can see
and understand the shadows
cast from our light
and the light that
grows from our shadows.
Photo by Khamkéo Vilaysing on Unsplash