Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s off to golf we go

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Hi-ho, hi-ho, it’s off to golf we go

A Rant for my Friend Tom, Who Enjoys Golf

This piece was copied directly from an email I sent to my pal Tom who is as addicted to golf as I am to pleasure-seeking and avoiding wage-slave-labor AT ALL FUCKIN’ COSTS!!!!!

It is offered here as a reminder that when you work for wages instead of following your passions you’re being stupid b/c you’re gonna die pretty soon, no really, you are and there is no golf in heaven b/c there ain’t any fuckin’ heaven, you morons!

How’d the driving range go yesterday? You self-mocked in your last e-mail for what on first glimpse and even after much deeper consideration appears to be a rather limited range of shit you focus on in these, yer golden fuckin’ years. You beat yourself up for loving golf too much.

Yet, all sarcasm aside, practicing hitting a little white ball as perfectly as you can, despite aging, despite the apparent meaninglessness of it on the larger scale of life, actually makes absolutely as much sense as any other activity. And the degree of dedication, mindfulness, striving for excellence, or at least improvement in doing a thing you enjoy, makes huge amounts of sense.

This is even more true if you decide, as I recently have, that people stupid enough to continue to live in Alabama after a bunch of misogynistic old white men crush women’s reproductive rights is somehow a good idea. This single thing is as necessary and sufficient a symbol of the hopelessness of our life situation as you need.

I absolutely give up on our political system (Constitution and all), the nature of mankind, the implausibility of any and all “faith” belief and especially as it is applied via religion. But also I give up on science and facts to save us b/c too few people will care about them and too many will not just ignore them but if forced to hear them dispute them and go on about their selfish, bullshit lives.

Have a nice fuckin’ day. Hit it long and straight and remember your putter is your pal unless it has decided to become your mortal enemy.

I’m sure glad I don’t play golf!

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