Politicians, Pundits, & Other Parasites
Touching Republican News
The Heartwarming Stories of the GOP
Are you tired of the negative and depressing news that dominates the media? Do you long for some uplifting and inspiring stories that will restore your faith in humanity? Then look no further than Touching Republican News, the blog that brings you the heartwarming stories of the GOP. Here you will find the tales of courage, compassion, wisdom, and love that define the Republican Party. You will read about how they bravely fought against the tyranny of science, how they generously helped the rich and powerful, how they wisely led the nation to greatness, and how they faithfully followed the teachings of Jesus. You will be moved to tears by their touching Republican news.
The Mugshot of King Donald ‘The Dumb’
Heartfelt Letters to Republicans
MAGA Psychos: How Stupidity & Christianity Produced Mini-Trumps
11 Minute Or Less Read Time
Life in Trumpistan: Making Americans Gargantuan Assholes
10 Minute Or Less Read Time
The people of Trumpistan were so used to following orders that they didn’t even question the sudden change in their religion. They just went about their daily lives, praying to Jesus while performing atrocities for their leader, Trump. But one day, a brave citizen stood up and said, “This is ridiculous! We can’t live like this!” And the leader just laughed and said, “Of course you can, because I said so.” And so the people continued to live in their hypocritical world, never daring to question their leader’s decisions.
Deep down, the people of Trumpistan knew something was wrong. They longed for the freedom to make their own choices and to live in a world where religion made sense. So they began to whisper among themselves, sharing their dreams of a better life. And slowly but surely, a spark of hope was ignited in their hearts. They realized that together, with the power of Jesus, they had the power to change their world and to create a brighter future for themselves and their children.