Politicians, Pundits, & Other Parasites

Touching Republican News

The Heartwarming Stories of the GOP

Are you tired of the negative and depressing news that dominates the media? Do you long for some uplifting and inspiring stories that will restore your faith in humanity? Then look no further than Touching Republican News, the blog that brings you the heartwarming stories of the GOP. Here you will find the tales of courage, compassion, wisdom, and love that define the Republican Party. You will read about how they bravely fought against the tyranny of science, how they generously helped the rich and powerful, how they wisely led the nation to greatness, and how they faithfully followed the teachings of Jesus. You will be moved to tears by their touching Republican news.


The Drinking of Politics: If you can’t drink heavily, at least drink lightly.


Terry Trueman
4 Minute Or Less Read Time
The Drinking of Politics: If you can’t drink heavily, at least drink lightly.

Unveiling the Political Divide: Examining the Role of Conservative Polarizing Stupidity in the 2024 Election


Vincent Triola
7 Minute Or Less Read Time
Unveiling the Political Divide: Examining the Role of Conservative Polarizing Stupidity in the 2024 Election

The Mugshot of King Donald ‘The Dumb’


Vincent Triola & Terry Trueman
4 Minute Or Less Read Time
The Mugshot of King Donald ‘The Dumb’

Heartfelt Letters to Republicans


Vincent Triola & Terry Trueman
6 Minute Or Less Read Time
Heartfelt Letters to Republicans

MAGA Psychos: How Stupidity & Christianity Produced Mini-Trumps


Terry Trueman
11 Minute Or Less Read Time
MAGA Psychos: How Stupidity & Christianity Produced Mini-Trumps

Life in Trumpistan: Making Americans Gargantuan Assholes


Terry Trueman
9 Minute Or Less Read Time
Life in Trumpistan: Making Americans Great Assholes

The people of Trumpistan were so used to following orders that they didn’t even question the sudden change in their religion. They just went about their daily lives, praying to Jesus while performing atrocities for their leader, Trump. But one day, a brave citizen stood up and said, “This is ridiculous! We can’t live like this!” And the leader just laughed and said, “Of course you can, because I said so.” And so the people continued to live in their hypocritical world, never daring to question their leader’s decisions.

Deep down, the people of Trumpistan knew something was wrong. They longed for the freedom to make their own choices and to live in a world where religion made sense. So they began to whisper among themselves, sharing their dreams of a better life. And slowly but surely, a spark of hope was ignited in their hearts. They realized that together, with the power of Jesus, they had the power to change their world and to create a brighter future for themselves and their children.


The GOP Sociopathic Brady Bunch Illusion


Vincent Triola & Terry Trueman
6 Minute Or Less Read Time
The GOP Sociopathic Brady Bunch Illusion